Posted in messy mama

Adventures in Kid Birthday Parties.

Kid birthday parties are exhausting, y’all.

My mom used to groan every time we were invited to a friend’s birthday party and I, of course, would be so freakin’ excited. Birthday parties were the BEST. I mean, free cake? Sign me up. Especially since we never really got to have big birthday parties as kids. Sure, we’d get to have sleepovers, or dinners with friends, but the “big” parties were only for “big” birthdays, like turning 13/16…

So, now that our kiddo is in preschool, he gets invited to more parties than he used to. I always try to let him go, but gahhhh it’s exhausting. ALSO, why don’t adults get to jump in the bounce house? I think that there should be a separate bounce house just for the adults, complete with a bouncer at the door to keep the kids out. And by “keep the kids out”, I mean “violently catapult them back to their own bounce house”. Seriously, it really bums me the hell out watching my kid get to jump while I stand in the heat.

I remember we were at this one birthday party a few years ago and my wackadoo of a child was all wound up from the fun. He suddenly felt like what this party really needed was for him to cover the entire bathroom floor (and his body) in soap and then pee on it. So, you know, that was a blast.

At today’s birthday party he was given candy. yay. yaaaaaay. He’s currently in his bed singing Jingle Bells. Things are going well.

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All that to say, today’s self care comes to you in the form of Bob’s Burgers reruns and a Lunchable I stole from my child from the fridge. He owes me.

The End.

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